Well, it’s that time of year again. It’s State of Origin – when QLD and NSW battle it out to find out which state (or at least which 17 Rugby League players) reigns supreme.
It’s a time of fierce competition, but the rivalry doesn’t end when the series does. For you see, Queenslanders and New South Welshman are very different people every day of the year. I should know – I grew up dividing my life between the two states.
These differences influence every part of our lives, including how we holiday. So here, just for fun, are 10 things a Queenslander would NEVER say while on holiday.
1. “Gee, it’s hot today!”
True story: One time going through security at New York’s JFK Airport, I was pulled aside for an extra pat-down because I was wearing “a suspicious amount of clothing”. “But it’s snowing!” I exclaimed. The security agent shrugged. “But I’m from Queensland!” I wailed. They didn’t get it. But my fellow Queenslanders do. Outside our home state, the world feels like a frozen tundra.
2. “Wow! This beach is amazing.”
It’s hard to be impressed when you’ve got beaches like Nudey, Noosa, Palm Cove, Burleigh, and Whitehaven in your own backyard. We’re a state full of beach snobs and we will not apologise.
3. “These trains suck! I miss Queensland Rail.”
There’s a lot of things to love about QLD, but the trains aren’t one of them. Who wants to wait half an hour on a platform at Caboolture? Sure, I could go across the road to the 24/7 bakery, but there’s a limit to how many cheese and spinach rolls I can eat in a day (that limit is five. It was amazing).
On the upside, this makes public transport everywhere else in the world seem incredible. London’s Tube has trains every two minutes – it feels like a miracle.
4. “Eek! This place has some scary wildlife.”
We come from the land of saltwater crocodiles, Irukandje jellyfish, box jellyfish, and blue-ringed octopi (not to mention all the sharks, snakes and spiders we share with the rest of Oz), so it takes a lot to scare us. Of course, we know the chances of encountering most of these creatures are incredibly slim, and that even if we did, they usually just want to be left alone. But that doesn’t stop us talking them up, especially if we’re travelling overseas. As far as the rest of the world knows, we’re a state full of Crocodile Dundees 😉
5. “No XXXX? I guess I’ll have lemonade.”
I don’t mean to knock our state beer (although I will say that Great Northern is better – fight me). But when we Queenslanders put our minds to it, we can achieve anything, including drinking strange new beers. Truly inspirational.
6. “Whoa! I’ve never seen a storm like this before.”
Yes, you have. You see them every other day in QLD, especially in summer. We may not get snow (generally. It has happened), but we do get skies as black as onyx, lightning that threatens to tear the world apart, and hail the size of golf balls. Compared to that, anything else is a drizzle.
7. “The people here are so friendly…”
I’m not saying everyone outside of QLD is a jerk… but sometimes it feels like it, especially in a big city. It’s a comparison thing. Even in Brisbane, people are usually chilled-out, friendly and keen for a chat. To a born-and-bred Queenslander, anything less than instant mateship can feel like a snub.
8. “Daylight savings? I can take it or leave it.”
Haha, nooo. Whether they’re aching for more post-work surfing time or terrified the extra sunshine will ruin their curtains, every Queenslander I know has *very* strong feelings about daylight savings. Experiencing it first-hand by travelling only reinforces them.
9. “I miss cane toads.”
Nooooope. Unless we’re talking about football players here (and you know we’re not), no-one has ever said this. Your first time going out barefoot at night WITHOUT having to worry about gross toady landmines is a revelation. It’s enough to cure any homesickness – at least for the night.
10. “This AFL/soccer/gridiron game is so exciting! Who needs Rugby League?”
Yeeeeah, no. No Queenslander has ever said this. Especially not during State of Origin. Go QLD!
Feeling left out? Check out ‘10 things people from NSW NEVER say on holiday’ – coming soon!
